Merry Christmas - The Christmas Wedding - the middle

The first part can be found here.

Hope fixed Zane and Tucker bowls of white chili left over from dinner, and they ate as the girls fixed more and more cookies. When they thought the mounds of cookies couldn’t get any larger, Hope told Elizabeth to get the binder. All three men groaned… any mention or sight of the binder now drew that response from them.

“Hush, now,” Hope said, grinning. “No wedding can be successfully completed without a binder. Mine is pink, not white.”

“You have a binder, too?” Zane was appalled that there could be more than one.

“Yep. Izzie decided early on that I was going to have so much to do from my place that I needed a binder of my own.” Hope said down at the table with a glass of ice and a Diet Coke. “I plan to burn the damn thing when they’re finally married.”

The men laughed, and Tucker thought about how easy it all seemed. There was an underlying tension between him and Hope, and he couldn’t bring himself to look her in the eyes, but she fit so well with his family. It was as if she had never been gone.

“Hold on just a darned minute, here,” Tucker said forcefully. “Have you been seeing everyone in my family or just Elizabeth? Have you all been keeping this secret from me?”

WT and Zane looked at one another, then back at Tucker. “No, Tuck. Just Elizabeth and me,” WT said. “And the only contact I had with her was regarding Elizabeth.”

“I’m so sorry, Tucker,” Hope said. “I never meant to hurt you, to lie to you about this. But I loved Elizabeth, and I missed her. When she called after the divorce to see if we could still be close, I jumped at the chance. And I have loved having her in my life. I would call WT periodically to make sure that something Elizabeth and I wanted to do together was ok with him. I made sure to get permission for everything big that we did together. But I haven’t been in contact with him other than that.

“And I haven’t seen Zane here since I moved out of this house. He’s just easily swayed by cookies,” she said smiling.

“And white chili,” Zane said. “Don’t forget the chili.”

At that moment, the big white binder thudded onto the table. Another groan.

“Shut up, you stupid boys,” Elizabeth said teasingly. “We’ve gotta get this done. I get married in less than a week. Help or get out.”

The three men were out of their chairs and out of the kitchen before she could change her mind. Given the option of not helping, all three saw that as a clear opportunity.

Hope and Elizabeth sat for another couple of hours working through the binder, seeing what still needed to be done. Around 11 p.m., Elizabeth’s phone rang, and she went to her bedroom to talk with Andy about how the preparations were going, leaving Hope alone in the kitchen.

She was putting the dinner dishes in the dishwasher when Tucker walked into the room. He was barefooted with a tee shirt and pajama bottoms on. Sexier than she remembered, Hope thought.

“Hi. Can I help with that?” Tucker asked.

“Almost done, but thanks for the offer,” Hope replied.

“Can we talk for a few minutes? I know it’s late, and you’ve got to be tired, but I’d like to say a few things.”

“Of course.” Hope started the dishwasher and followed Tucker into the library. The small tree’s lights shone in the darkness. The two sat on the leather sofa, each taking a far end.

Tucker leaned forward, elbows on his knees, trying to gather his thoughts. Hope tucked her feet under her and pulled an afghan off the back of the sofa to cover up. She was quiet as she waited for Tucker to begin. She knew they were both thinking about how things ended with them.

Other than Hope’s great aunt, she really had never had any family. As a teen, however, she met a boy who became her best friend. They never had a romantic relationship, but they were close as siblings. His family had been killed in a car accident years before, so they had a bond of aloneness that their friendship both strengthened and weakened.

They understood one another’s feelings of being an orphan and yet, being together took away that inherent loneliness. Tucker knew of Mason when he and Hope began seeing one another. He met and liked Mason, but Tucker always felt a shiver of jealousy for Mason.

Just after their fifth anniversary, Hope got a call from Mason. He was very ill, dying. She was crushed, insisted on being with him at the hospital. She took a leave of absence from the school and went to be with him as he died.

Tucker was supportive at first, but as the weeks drew on, the jealousy ate at him. He couldn’t control it and began to accuse Hope of having more than a platonic love for Mason. Having always had family surrounding him, he couldn’t understand the way she felt about Mason, couldn’t empathize with her need to not leave him alone.

When she returned home to Tucker for overnight visits when she arranged for friends to stay with Mason, Tucker goaded her into fights. Most nights, she slept with Elizabeth.

When she was with Mason, Tucker would call and leave irrational, jealous messages on her phone, accusing her of having an emotional affair with Mason, even as he lay dying.

Hope was served with the divorce papers at the hospital two days before Mason died. She felt as if her whole world had crumpled around her. Mason left her his entire estate in his will, and when WT called to ask where to send her things, she said to Mason’s house. She resigned from the school, and moved into Mason’s home.

Hope jumped when something soft bushed her leg, drawing her out of her daze. “Why, Puddles, you sweet thing,” she said to the cat that swished by her. “I haven’t seen you all day.”

“He doesn’t come out much these days,” Tucker said, “getting older and all. He tends to wander the nights.”

Clearing his throat and running his hand over his scruffy chin, Tucker turned to face Hope, looking in her eyes for the first time. The tenderness he remembered was still there.

“I told Zane years ago that if I ever saw you again, there were things I was going to say to you, whenever it was and wherever it was. There were things I needed to say for me.”

“Ok, Tucker. It’s ok. I understand. Go ahead,” Hope said quietly.

“Could you not be so nice about it? Could you?!” Tucker stood suddenly and frightened the cat at his feet which ran screeching from the room. “Damn,” he muttered.

Turning back to Hope, he began. “I’m sorry. There aren’t nearly enough ways for me to express how sorry I am. I made some horrible choices that we’ll both have to live with forever. I’m sorry.”

“Oh, Tuck,” Hope whispered. “I’m sorry, too. We both made bad choices. This wasn’t entirely your fault.”

“How can you say that?” he said, sitting again on the sofa, closer to her this time. “Of course it was my fault. I was jealous and irrational and crazy and mean and hot-headed and impulsive.”

“Yes, you were. But I was selfish and put someone else ahead of you in my life.”

Tucker smiled and took Hope’s hand. “For a month. You put someone close to you ahead of me for a month. I should have been able to take that. I’m sorry. I want you to know I regret what I did, how I did it, all of it. If I could take it back, I would.

“I’m not asking you to forgive me, but I need you to know that you didn’t do anything wrong. I was wrong on so many levels, and I am so sorry.”

Hope pulled her hand from his and gently touched his face. “All forgiven.”

***

The next two days passed in a blur, with Hope and Elizabeth focusing solely on the wedding. Elizabeth had wanted a small ceremony at the ranch, with the reception following there, too. It would be an intimate but festive gathering.

Hope was making most of the appetizers for the reception, and the house was constantly filled with the scents of the holidays. Zane mentioned to Tuck in passing that if Tuck didn’t remarry Hope, he would give it a shot. Zane had always been a fan of Hope’s cooking.

But Zane’s light-hearted suggestion only mirrored what Tuck had already been thinking, though he knew it was crazy to think it at all.

After that first night, Tucker had made it a point to go downstairs every night after Elizabeth’s 11 o’clock call from Andy. He knew Hope would be alone, finishing up in the kitchen or drinking a cup of hot tea. They had shared some cookies and caught one another up on their lives.

He was still surprised she wasn’t married again. She had told him she dated a fair bit but never found anyone special. She never said ‘anyone like you,’ but that was what Tuck hoped she meant.

He told her about the community service work he did with his law firm, about how he devoted more time to the ranch now, could see its value. She told him about how she used the inheritance Mason left her to begin an outreach program for children in a poor neighborhood.

They never touched, never talked again about their relationship or their parting. Tucker wasn’t sure what that meant, but he didn’t press the issue. He just continued to find ways to spend time with Hope. If he wanted a second chance, this was it. It was unexpected, to be sure, but he was going to take advantage of it.

Wednesday morning, when Zane and Tucker arrived at the breakfast table after taking care of their morning routines around the ranch, they were treated to homemade waffles and sausage and fruit to go with their coffee. WT and Elizabeth were already nearly finished with their breakfast, savoring a second cup of coffee.

“Enjoy everyone. After this, we work like dogs today,” Hope said, bringing out the binder, thus provoking the expected groans. “Shut up,” she and Elizabeth said together.

“Andy’s coming in tonight, and he and Elizabeth need some time alone together tomorrow before his family arrives on Friday, so we need to get a ton of things done today.”

Seeing Zane and Tuck rolling their eyes at one another, Hope said, “Keep in mind that a day off for Izzie means a day off for you, too.” Tuck knew this was his chance. He could spend the entire day with Hope.

“Ok. We’ll do whatever. Just point us in the right direction.”

Zane, WT and Tuck were in charge of getting the land ready for cars to park alongside the driveway. The plan was for the guests to park a mile or so away from the house, and several horse-drawn sleighs would meet them and carry them to the house. The snow had been falling for days in a pretty, light powder, and it was beautiful.

Hope had already decorated the front porch with more holly and ivy. There were two little wooden snowmen on the porch dressed as a bride and groom, and the front door had more mistletoe on it than the trees in the pasture.

The women finished preparing the food, and went into town for a final fitting for Elizabeth’s dress. They picked up the gifts for the bridal party and stopped in to touch base with the minister.

“How good to see you, Hope,” he said. “Maybe I’ll marry you again someday.” Hope and Elizabeth laughed, though they both wondered if the other were thinking that very thing.

By the time they returned back to the ranch, Andy had already arrived. Elizabeth whisked him off to her suite to catch him up to speed on the preparations that had already been completed. Hope began making dinner, and Tuck joined her, offering to help.

As they chatted and chopped vegetables for the gumbo, Tuck asked Hope what her plans were for the next day. “If you aren’t doing wedding work or going back home for the day, we could spend the day together.” He felt as if he were holding his breath waiting for her answer.

She set the knife onto the cutting board, and wiped her hands on her “Cookies for the Reindeer” apron. She was facing him, not speaking. She was looking at him intently, as if she could find the answer she needed in his eyes. He never broke her gaze, hoping she would trust him again.

“This seems like less than a good idea, Tuck. I’ve enjoyed this time with you. I’ve loved being with your family again, loved those quiet talks with you at night. But I can’t let myself get too close. It would be too easy for me to…”

“To what, Hope?”

The clamor of Elizabeth and Andy chasing one another down the stairs distracted them both, one grateful for the distraction, the other disappointed by it.

“What is all the commotion?” Hope asked as she walked toward the soon-to-be-newlyweds.

“Andy brought it! Your Christmas present from me! Open it now!” Elizabeth was so excited. Tuck wondered how many presents had been exchanged between the women without his knowledge.

“It’s not Christmas yet!” WT boomed as he walked in the room and swiped the present from Elizabeth’s hands.

“But she won’t be here Christmas, and I’ll be on my honeymoon, and I want her to have it now. Come on, Daddy.”

“To be fair, WT,” Hope began a bit guiltily, “I did already give her my Christmas present to her.”

“What? Have you two no Christmas shame?” Zane laughed. “Nope,” they said together shaking their heads and laughing.

“Can she open it with all of us here,” WT asked, “because now I want to see it, too.”

“Yes! Go on, Hope. You’re going to love it!”

WT gave Hope the gift as they all gathered around the kitchen table again. Tuck was enjoying the fun but still wondering what Hope might have been talking about… could she possibly still love him?

Hope held the small package up near her face and shook it, listening for a rattle of some sort. “Oh, just open it,” Zane said.

“Clearly, you haven’t done a gift with either of these women in a while,” Andy said. “We could be here all night. She’s gonna shake and rattle and feel and guess, and Izzie’s gonna deny and deny and egg her on. I’ll be well into pie by the time that present is opened.”

“Fine,” Hope laughed. She ripped the bright red paper off the box, and lifted the lid. A small slip of paper was inside. Hope read it and laughed. Elizabeth and Andy both started laughing, too, until WT insisted they share.

“Studies have been done that show that fish tanks can be soothing to children, so I have aquariums all around the lending library. I don’t want to have a library cat or anything like that because of the allergies some of the children have. So we have fish.

“But the joke is that I can’t keep the fish alive for anything. Every morning, before we open the store portion of the library, I go though and do the death count… See how many didn’t make it through the night. Literally, I’m at the pet store so often, the owner, Paulie, and I have become friends. I’m on his wife’s Christmas card list.”

“So I got her a gift certificate to the pet store for endless amounts of fish,” Elizabeth finished, laughing. “Paulie said he would keep your favorite Mickey Mouse fish in stock all the time. Just go in whenever and tell him how many you need.”

“You’re really dedicated to this library, huh?” Zane asked. “You could never leave it.” Tuck didn’t appreciate Zane’s tone but knew the question was easier answered coming from Zane than from him.

“I love it. I do. I think it’s my life’s work,” she said getting up and dishing gumbo into a soup toureen. She sat it on the table, and everyone began filling their bowls.

“I loved teaching, but I could see so many children who had great potential but few opportunities. So, when I had the financial ability, I opened the library in a poor neighborhood. It isn’t a bad area, you know. There’s not a lot of crime. These are just good people who don’t have the education or means to find better jobs that would allow them to give their children the opportunities they need.

“So I do what I can through the library. The little bookstore in the front pays for the salaries of the staff. We’ve got lots of volunteers who help the kids and all of the tutoring we do is free. I get grants and donations to pay for the programming.”

“She’s been approached about starting similar libraries in other areas,” Elizabeth said excitedly.

“Is that true, Hope?” WT asked.

“Yes. The school system heard of what I was doing and wanted to monitor us to see if the things we planned would make a difference. They’ve been tracking the grades of twenty or thirty of our students and have found that their grades have risen significantly with the involvement in the program.

“Several school boards have expressed an interest along with several independent education organizations. My preference would be for these to remain independent, to work alongside the school boards but not be under the control of them.”

“So would you move to start these?” Zane asked.

“Well, ideally, yes, that would be what would happen. In my head, I envision it being something where volunteers would assist and where someone from the area would step up to do the educational training and become the director. But I would want to be very involved until each library could stand alone.”

“That’s amazing,” Tucker said.

“Thanks. I’m kinda proud of it myself. I’m very fortunate that I’ve found someone who is essentially in the role of director now, so I can free myself up to consider these other opportunities,” she said.

“Elizabeth and Andy here have both been instrumental in the success of the library. Both have served as tutors to the kids, and Andy’s my fill-in Friday night security guard for when we have celebration parties for the kids.”

“And dead fish wrangler,” Andy said. “Don’t forget that.”

“No, no, I won’t forget,” Hope laughed. “Now, how about some pie?”

***

Tucker made his way down to the kitchen for his nightly 11 o’clock visit with Hope but Elizabeth was waiting for him in the hallway.

“I know where you’re going,” she said.

“Ok,” he replied.

“I love her.”

“Me, too, I think.”

“Be sure.” And with that, she padded off to her room, fuzzy socks glowing in the dark.

Filed under Most Everything | Permalink |
Tagged with: Mika