Comments on: and so it goes…

By: and so it went… at Chasing Contentment

and so it went… at Chasing Contentment — Wed, 20 Oct 2010 01:02:26 +0000

[...] few months ago, I wrote a post entitled ‘and so it goes’ about an on-going struggle I have with my parents and their need to advise me of the sins they see [...]

By: nicole

nicole — Tue, 24 Aug 2010 21:31:57 +0000

Well said, Terri!

By: Goldenboy

Goldenboy — Tue, 24 Aug 2010 21:28:20 +0000

Yikes! Oh yeah Terri. Well said.

By: Terri

Terri — Tue, 24 Aug 2010 03:48:02 +0000

Oh, Chel, I am so disturbed by this utterly abusive dialogue your dad continues to force on you. And that is exactly what it is: abuse. Who does that?? The poor timing (designed to deliver the cruelest blow), the self-righteiousness and the complete absence of compassion are as far from Christ as I can imagine. He is not offering fatherly counsel, he is unjustly berating you. BIG difference. I hate to use a Facebook reference to make my point, but there is real truth in it — Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than parking in a garage makes you a car.

Having recently re-discovered church ourselves, I can say that I do feel closer to God when I worship in a community of faith. But it means nothing to know the rules of our faith if you do not practice them in truth and in spirit. That mindset has lead to this religion of hate that permeates our world and makes “Godly” people feel justified in beating others into submission, rather than showing the perfect love that Jesus is. It only drives people FROM Christ, not TO Him.

For your own sake and the sake of your family, I pray you will not tolerate any more of these attacks. If you even catch a whiff of criticism, don’t open the letter, don’t read the e-mail, don’t answer the call. You can and should love and honor your parents, but only insofar as it doesn’t leave bruises that won’t heal.

You are a truly amazing, loving mother and wife. You don’t just talk about Christ’s love, you shower it on the people around you. Never, NEVER underestimate the witness that is to them and to your children.

By: nicole

nicole — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 22:42:29 +0000

I feel so blessed to have you as a sister n law. You are really the sister I never had! When I married your brother, I never expected to gain two people that would bring such a black cloud around me, and I see the way you and John are being treated and its been unbearable. I’ve been a victim of their criticism and unsoliscited advice and its extremely difficult to keep my thoughts quiet. I haven’t endured near what you have, so I can only imagine how upset you feel. .
The pamphlets on child rearing, marriage, what vitamins to take, what to feed your family, tips on exercising, dressing modestly (had to really laugh at that!) Lol!
Dreams of laughing, sharing funny stories, camping, fishing, grilling, playing cards or other types of games grandparents play, pleasant trips to the zoo, park, ect sadly remain dreams.

Knowing the scriptures and knowing just how to place them in your speech, hardly qualifies for living in God’s word. Even the Devil knows the scripture.

I believe they are dear sweet people that need guidance in how they treat their family.

I grew up in a family of parents who admitted their mistakes and apologized. They also shared their personal struggles and God’s forgiveness. I knew they loved me unconditionally. I was never afraid of telling them anything out of fear that they would never love me.

I’m just thankful, despite the destructive parenting, you and John turned out to be the fantastic people you are! Must have been the guidance and example of your grandparents!

Love ya!