happily happy … even ever after
Next week, Mike and I will celebrate our 16th anniversary. I am delighted to say that we will celebrate it happily. There were times during this last year when I wasn’t so sure.
Mike and I have always been easy. Things between us just flow. We have had difficult times… times when the world around us was difficult, when situations were difficult, when this or that wasn’t easy. But rarely have we had times when things between us weren’t easy. But this last year was pretty much one long exercise in not easy between us.
As I approached my 40th birthday, I had to do some looking at myself and my life, and I was unsettled for a time. In the midst of that, I had a man hit on me & I was flattered, I admit. And then for a period last year, Mike didn’t so much groove to me for reasons of his own. As I talked to my girlfriends about what I was going through, I was surprised (but reassured) to discover how many women in my age range were struggling with similar issues.
Choices we made 10, 15, 20 years ago that seemed reasonable at the time seemed to have snowballed into something unmanageable now. Sure, hon, I’ll take a job doing something I don’t love so you can pursue your passion but once you’re all established, I’ll switch to something more suited to me. You go get your degree & I’ll put you through school with the understanding that once you’re done, it’ll be my turn. Little sacrifices that made sense, that were supposed to be just the beginning in a tit for tat situation somehow turned into a lifetime of something else. Tit never turned into tat. Old habits turned into lifestyles. And too often, we looked up and wondered if we made the right choices.
But, blessedly, with some work, we ended the year as we began it… happily together. Last weekend, as I got a pedicure, the nail tech laughed after I told a story (because I will tell a story!) and said, “You’ve lived. I can tell in your laugh. You laugh so you don’t cry, to keep things together.” I thought that was the best compliment. Because we have lived, and we are laughing. And in some ways, I’m grateful for this last year, hard though it was, because it reaffirmed for me that this is exactly where I want to be. Even when it’s challenging, I want to be with Mike.
To be walking this path with him, to figure out this life as we go along… seems like a pretty good deal to me.
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Menu Plan Monday - the anniversary edition
I get annoyed with making these lists, but I find that when I don’t, I end up leaving the grocery store with a mish-mash of ingredients that rarely yield a week’s worth of meals. And then, we end up eating out more than we’d anticipated, which doesn’t mesh well with Mike’s new frugality/pay everything off plan.
So here we go.
Sunday - pancakes for breakfast… burritos for lunch (everyone keeps raving about the Amy’s brand, so we’re gonna try them)… spaghetti and meatballs (I hate meatballs, but I’m thinking I can buy them pre-made and add them into my Ninja sauce)
Monday - chicken alfredo (with broccoli, of course)
Tuesday - loaded baked potatoes
Wednesday -brinner - My kids would eat breakfast for dinner every single night of the week if I’d let them. So here’s our weekly omlet night.
Thursday - IT’S OUR 15TH ANNIVERSARY!! I ordered deep dish Chicago pizzas from the place I liked the best when we visited in July. We’re going to share anniversary pizza with the kids.
Friday - The cousins are coming to visit. I think we’ll start the weekend with chicken spaghetti, one of my favorites.
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happy, happy
Happy Anniversary to my brother and his wife! It’s been a really lovely seven years with you, Nicole!
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vaca, vaca, dear vaca
Tomorrow, Mike and I leave on our first four-night vacation without the kids since before Griff was born. That’s right. It’s now been 11 years since we spent that much time alone.
Stacy kindly offered to keep the kids so Mike and I could take a trip for our 15th wedding anniversary. Our anniversary is next month, but by then, we’re well on our way to school and such. So this is the perfect time to go.
We’re going to go to art galleries and museums and outdoor concerts. We’re going to eat Chicago style pizza and sushi and seafood, and I’m not going to order from the children’s menu once (yeah, I order from the children’s menu & swap with Griff so he can eat a full size meal and I can still get the kid rate on the bill).
I’m going to set the temperature in the hotel room really cold at night and snuggle under the covers. I’m going to clip those hotel room curtains together so that it’s the darkest of dark, and I’m going to sleep way past 6:30 a.m.
Sounds lovely, doesn’t it?
I read an article recently that most marriages only last 10-15 years. We figure we should make the most of these next five. 
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Here or there…
Mike and I are planning our anniversary trip this summer … we’ll have been married 15 years in August. Stacy has graciously offered to keep the kids so we can go away together, but now we can’t decide where to go. 
We’re lazy people. Really, we are. We want to go somewhere and eat yummy food, wander around, maybe go to the beach or shop or sight-see. Not much else.
We talked about going to New Orleans because we’ve always loved going there together, and because the food is so amazing. But it seems wrong to plan an entire trip around the praline bacon at Elizabeth’s.
We talked about going to the Keys, but that’s a 6-9 hour drive, and I’m not so keen on that. We talked about going to our favorite beach, but we go there with the kids. We talked about a cruise.
We talked about Gatlinburg and Savannah. We’ve done a lot of talking. Not really any actual planning. And since we’re saving up for this, we need to do some actual planning. So I’m asking for suggestions…
Where should we go?
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