A prayer…

My friend, Mandy, isn’t feeling well. Mandy is the strongest woman I know, outside of a litle lady named Dannie, who happens to be Mandy’s mama. Mandy used to tease me about being sick all the time. I told her it was because she didn’t have kids that she was well all the time. I never got sick before having babies.

And then Mandy had a really difficult delivery and time after her sweet Olivia was born, and not only did Mandy get sick more, but she worried more about being sick. It’s been a struggle for her to overcome the fear.

Last week, she had a headache and some fatigue that didn’t go away like it should have for a working mama (come on, we’ve all got a headache and some fatigue). She called the doctor, got some meds, and then still didn’t feel better.

Because she’s got a amazing physician (yep, I recommended him), she’s getting good care. But as a GP, he can’t do it all himself. So she’s waiting for the needed tests and diagnosis.

Until then, she’s sick, barely able to care for herself. She and Josh have been blessed because Dannie has taken both Mandy and Olivia home with her so she can watch over both of her girls. A mother’s love is unending, isn’t it? Thankfully, Mandy and Dannie have a friendship as well as a love.

The waiting is difficult. The doctors have mentioned the possibility of MS as a diagnosis, and we have some knowledge of that. Mike’s mom had MS back so long ago that they didn’t offer her any treatment at all. My sweet friend, Mika, has MS and is on a treatment plan that allows her to do things that, frankly, amaze me. (She’s one of my heroes.)

I’m too far away to take Josh dinner while he’s home alone and missing his girls. I’m too far away to take a turn staying with Mandy to make sure she’s ok. So I’m asking people to say a quick prayer… for knowledge and healing and peace.

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Tagged with: Josh • Mandy • Mika • MS • prayer

An open letter to a friend…

Dear you,

I know the things you are facing right now are overwhelming. I honestly cannot imagine how hard this is for you. I wish I was closer and could help you somehow. I know, of course, that even if I lived nearby, there wouldn’t be much I could do for you. But in my head, somehow just going for a Starbucks or a Sonic Diet Coke or a Blizzard would be helpful.

Short of that, I wanted to tell you that I am honored to be your friend. You are an amazing woman. Truly. If I were to take a pencil and paper and write down the names of all of the people whose lives you have touched for the better, I would run out of paper and energy before I ran out of names. And those are just the people I know personally.

As you walk this path, I know that you are walking it alone, and I hate that for you. But I am proud of you. I am proud of you for being the woman you are. I am proud of you for facing your fears… because I know you must be afraid. I would be. Frankly, I’m a little afraid for you.

But when I’m afraid, I pray. Even when I didn’t pray much, I prayed when I was afraid. And so, I’m going to pray for you this week. I’m going to pray for the people who are in this situation with you. And maybe, by posting this, the other people reading will pray for you, too. And maybe each person will stop and think of someone they know who is walking a difficult path alone, and they will pray for those people, too. And pretty soon, you will have touched those lives, too, if only from the ripple effect of prayer.

In the end, whether I lived close by or this far away, I think the only really important thing I can do is to pray. And to tell you that you are strong and beautiful and loved. So that is what I will do for you.

All my love,

me

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Tagged with: friendship • prayer

Precious Moment in the Mama Van

I worry sometimes (Mike would say that I should end this sentence here and not bother going any further, but oh, no, I’m going on!) about the fact that we haven’t taken our kids to church regularly in two years. That’s right. Two years. We’ve visited here and there but haven’t found our place yet.

And I worry that they are missing valuable spiritual guidance.

Today, on the way home in the van, Eliza says to me, “Mama, it’s gonna rain.” There were big, dark clouds above us, so I told her she was probably right. She said, “we need to thank God.”

And she clasped her hands together and prayed to thank God for the rain.

And I’m thanking God that even while we’ve been away from organized religion, we’ve been close enough to Him that Eliza knows to thank God for the rain and that she’s comfortable enough with Him to say a spontaneous prayer in the mama van.

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Tagged with: prayer • rain

Odds and ends… or killing time till I can go to bed

Here are a few random things… I’m way too tired to write much. We’re all playing Wii, and I’m essentially waiting for it to get dark enough to send Eliza to bed.

** It’s been a long and tiring week at work, but I feel really good about the work I’ve done. It feels like I’m doing so much better, like I understand things so much better. Of course, I worry that I’m wrong & just misguided. But I find that people ask me questions as if they assume I’ll know the answer. That’s such a big compliment to me, and yet, I worry these people are falsely placing their trust in me. I have to meet with my supervisor tomorrow to discuss all of my claims that I can’t figure out what to do with or have messed up or both. That’ll bring me back to reality, I’m sure. But maybe, just maybe, I really am getting better. Wouldn’t that be cool?

** I’m now loving So You Wanna Be an Old Supermodel on TVLand. I think it’s got a classier name, but come on, that’s what it is. Mike said last night that the women on it are meaner the the women on other reality shows… they don’t seem to bond like they do on Idol or Project Runway. Well, honey, these women are old. They don’t have time to bond. This is their last shot at this thing. They’ve got friends at home. They want to win. I think it should tide me over till Project Runway comes back next month.

** Griff watches too much tv. I know because I love tv. I’m so excited about the summer shows, I can hardly stand it.

** I’ve been praying. I know that if you haven’t been reading my blog for long, that probably sounds odd. But for those of you who’ve been with me through this journey of moving and being angry at God and then thinking God was angry with me and then being a bit ambivalent, well, it’s a good thing to be praying and feeling that warmth and connection that comes from that.

** There was super response to my Swap Me, Sell Me, Chai Me. I have a couple pieces left if anyone didn’t play the first time and wants to jump in now.

Now, I’m thinking I’ll go slather my LUSH Sacred Truth on my face and try to scare Eliza into bed. If it doesn’t work, I’ll at least have smooth skin.

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Tagged with: Jewelry • LUSH • old models • prayer • tv • Work

I make a wish, I wish I might…

Things this mama would like tonight…

* for every single person in this house to feel okay

* for Eliza’s fever to break and stay broken

* to have chocolate ice cream without nuts in the house

* for the pants I want to wear tomorrow to be ironed by the ironing fairies

* to be as strong and determined as our Griff, who is now walking without his walker

* to not have to stop my whiney post to clean up another round of Eliza tummy yuck

* to not enjoy “iCarly” quite as much as I do

* for the ability to make a decent wrapped hoop for my jewelry

* to be able to stay home tomorrow (I hate having to leave when the kids are sick)

* to like the teacakes I made Mike this afternoon (my great-grandmother’s recipe & he loves them)

* to know for sure if I should be worried about Eliza or assume it’s just a virus

* for one entire night’s sleep… you know, with all of those hours consequetively

But, short of any of those things happening, I’ll have a fudgesicle and practice my wire wraps. And pray Eliza feels better tomorrow. And maybe try to convince Mike to iron my pants. He is, by far, the cutest ironing fairy ever.

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Tagged with: iCarly • Jewelry • prayer • sickness